The Bachelor: The 10 reasons Ben REALLY chose Courtney

(NON) SPOILER ALERT: Unless you've been living under a rock or trapped under a large object, you know that the Bachelor, Ben Flajnik proposed to model Courtney Robertson last night. Duh.

And then they broke up.

Cue shock and surprise.

And then with tears in their eyes and Chris Harrison looking on (because of course Chris Harrison would be looking on) they got back together on the After The Final Rose special.

At this point, they deserve each other.

The Bachelor used to have so much mystery. Down to the final seconds, we never knew who was going to get that final rose. Whose leg was going to exit the limo, helicopter, boat, first? Not anymore. Now we have Reality Steve to tell us who gets chosen. And Us Magazine to thank for showing us pictures of Ben with his arms on some other woman's ass and his tongue down another woman's throat (who btw, were just "friends").

So it's no surprise that Ben chose Courtney. Who, in my opinion, was part of one of the most unromantic proposals in Bachelor history. With fake tears glistening in her eyes, she threw off her glove faster than her clothes when she went skinny dipping just to get that ring on her finger. All that was missing was her turning to camera and saying, "I got the ring bitches."

Even though Ben claims he proposed because he "fell in love" and they had such a strong connection, here's why he REALLY chose Courtney:

1. She didn't ride in on a horse. (Sorry Lindzi.) Instead she strode in with a plan ("I'm in it to win it") and a pronouncement that she was a model.  Note to future Bachelorettes, don't try so hard. Walk in on your own two feet- please. Oh, and points if you can say you are a model (even catalog work will do!).

2. She's a model. Sorry girls, but even though she's kind of fugly if you ask me, she was on the cover of Fitness magazine (cue the ooohs and ahhhs). And PS: She skinny dips.

3. She skinny dips. Even Lindzi agrees. On Good Morning America this morning Lindzi told Lara Spencer, "Maybe if I skinny-dipped, I wouldn't be here with you."

4. She's complicated and crazy. (And we know men go crazy for crazy.) She's nice to him but she's mean to the girls. And he just can't "figure out" who the real Courtney is. She's got a little bit of "sass" in her. She caused rifts in the house yet she kissed his ass constantly. She was "intriguing" and I don't care what he says, but he liked that. Also, she's a model and she skinny dips.

5. Wine. I've never seen so much wine consumed- even by the owner of a winery. There's wine on a gondola up to the top of a ski slope, there's wine for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I  wouldn't be surprised if there was a bottle of wine on the back of the toilet. But the bigger question is: How do they prevent purple teeth?

6. She kisses ass. Let's face it, Ben's got himself a little taste of fame right before The Bachelor started (Jennifer Love Hewitt anyone) so as long as Courtney was willing to sit around and tell him he's the greatest thing since sliced bread, he was smitten. And that's pretty much all she did.

7. She played hard to get- even at the end. I hate to say it, but Courtney is a smart ass bitch. Even when it's down to the final two and she's a shoe in, the night before the final rose ceremony, she pulls back and creates doubt in Ben's mind that she might not say yes.

8. She was able to overlook Ben's hideous outfits and overgrown mop. Bad leather jackets, mock turtle necks, suspenders, tank tops, oh my. But then again, I shouldn't give Courtney too much credit. When you're a millionaire wine maker under all those bad clothes and hair, anything is possible.

9. She made a memory book about their time together on the REALITY show. ORIGINAL- not. Oy, vey, Ben, the producers took all those pictures and printed them out. Get a clue.

10. Did I mention she skinny dips?

xoxo,

Lisa

Jane Green's 5 Things I'd Tell the Teen Me

Today's guest: Jane Green Why we love her: Author of twelve bestselling novels, Jane Green is one of our all-time favorites and we've read Jemina J more times than we care to admit.  Not to mention, she's one of the nicest authors we've had on the site over the years! MAJUH girl crushin' going on over here!

Her latestAnother Piece of my Heart

The scoop on it: Andi has spent much of her adult life looking for the perfect man, and at thirty-seven, she's finally found him.  Ethan—divorced with two daughters, Emily and Sophia—is a devoted father and even better husband.  Always hoping one day she would be a mother, Andi embraces the girls like they were her own. But in Emily’s eyes, Andi is an obstacle to her father’s love, and Emily will do whatever it takes to break her down. When the dynamics between the two escalate, they threaten everything Andi believes about love, family, and motherhood—leaving both women standing at a crossroad in their lives…and in their hearts.

Our thoughts: Jane handles the topic of marrying a man with children perfectly-you'll laugh and cry in this fantastic read!

Fun fact: Jane was the first author to do a VIDEO post for us, and we think there's no doubt she's ready for the prime time.

Giveaway: FIVE copies!  Leave a comment here and we'll choose the winners after 6pm PST on Sunday March 18th. Good luck!

 

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS...JANE GREEN'S 5 THINGS I'D TELL THE TEEN ME

1. Life can only get better from here.  You will, like the proverbial fine wine, get better with age, and as difficult as it may be to believe now, you will reach a place where you are comfortable in your skin.

2. One day you will fall in love, and it won't be painful, and you won't lose yourself, and you won't be left wondering why things never work out. One day you will find him, and he will love you, and honor you, and show you what true partnership means. It may be a rocky road until then, but it is worth the wait.

3. It is okay to feel slightly different. All the people who have gone on to greatness, knew they didn't fit in with the rest of the crowd. Embrace your differences, they will lead to an extraordinary life.

4. If you feel people may not have your best interests in mind, they don't. If you feel uncomfortable being around someone, there is good reason. Never force a friendship or allow yourself to be forced into one unless you feel loved, and safe.

5. One day there will be a hair treatment called Keratin, and it holds the potential to change your life.

Thanks Jane! xoxo, L&L

To read more about Jane, head on over to her website or find her on Facebook and Twitter.

Jen Lancaster's 5 Things I'd Tell the Teen Me

Happy 3rd Birthday to our perfect baby, Chick Lit Is Not Dead. Thank you for never keeping us up all night, never having a diaper blow out, for never going through those terrible twos--and most importantly, for never talking back! We love you. In the last three years, we've hosted over 150 authors, launched five features (number six revealed today!) and written two (almost three) books.

But today it's all about the number ONE.

One majuhly talented and funny as hell author who's on our site to help us celebrate...

You know that feeling when you see a young guy that's so hot you don't care that you're openly salivating like a cougar in heat?

Or when you bite into that rich, chocolate dessert that's so good you don't care that it's going straight to your ass?

Or when you cry just a little when Phillip Phillips makes it into American Idol's top 24. (Okay, maybe that's just Lisa.)

Well...

That's how we felt when this author not only said YES to our invitation to help us celebrate, but to launch our latest feature: 5 Things I'd Tell the Teen Me.

Jen. Effing. Lancaster

Need we say more?

Oh and just for shits and giggles, we also asked if she'd give away FIVE copies of her fabulous novel, If You Were Here (out in paperback March 6th). She said yes to that too. Y'all can thank us later. Just leave a comment and you'll be entered to win one of five copies. We'll randomly select the winners after 6pm PST on Sunday, March 4.

So we're not going to make you wait any longer because we're not dumb asses. We know you want to find out what Jen Lancaster has to say.

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS...JEN LANCASTER'S 5 THINGS I'D TELL THE TEEN ME

First, happy anniversary! Cheers to three great years of bringing chick lit authors and readers together!

I’m really excited to share the advice I’d give to a teenage me. This topic is at the very front of my mind as I’m in the middle of writing a novel called Here I Go Again which takes an in-depth look at the origin of high school mean girls. The central theme is how decisions we make in the past can impact us for years to come. (I realize this sounds uber-serious, so please note there’s also a time travel element and a tribute to David Coverdale of Whitesnake.)

Anyway, if I could offer a seventeen year old Jeni five bits of advice, I’d say the following:

1. Stop calling yourself “Jeni” and dotting the “i” with a sunflower. You sound like an asshole.

2. Okay, the first suggestion is pretty specific, so I’ll do six instead. Ahem, here goes… everyone is currently going through something. Yeah, maybe you know some girls who seem to have their shit together more than you. Maybe they’re thinner and more popular, maybe they’re dating the guy you wish you were with, maybe they have a designer bag for which you’d kill. Don’t waste your time envying them because you have no idea what happens behind the closed doors of their life. All is not what it seems. Maybe the skinny chick has an eating disorder. Maybe the girl with the hot boyfriend puts up with his abuse. Maybe the one with an awesome bag would rather have nothing if it meant her divorcing parents weren’t engaged in a possession-based arms race. Don’t let yourself be distracted by what anyone else has or what you believe you lack. You just worry about you. The grass is rarely greener.

3. Don’t be so wrapped up in looking cool. Follow the Tao of Snookie on Jersey Shore when she says, “You do you and I’ll do me.” (I assume this is more of a “to thine own self be true” aphorism and not something sexual.) (At least I hope.) Be who you want to be, not who everyone peer-pressures you to be. Individuality is cool. Following the pack for the sake of belonging isn’t.

4. You’re not fat. Seriously, you’ll never have the metabolism of a seventeen year old again. Appreciate what you have now, because trust me, your ass will never be this high again.

5. If you believe high school is the best time of your life, then you’re doing it wrong. “It gets better” should ring true for almost everyone. If it doesn’t resonate with you, then you’re probably your high school’s version of Regina George. Fix that shit immediately or you’re going to be the gal who peaked at seventeen and who everyone shuns at the reunion.

6. The harder you work now, the easier it will be when you get older. I coasted through high school, doing what was expected and not a lick more. Then in college, I did even less. Sure, eventually everything worked out for me, but not without having to move some major boulders in my thirties. I wish that I’d possessed awareness that my path would have been so much smoother if I’d buckled down when I was building a foundation.

Now if only I could travel back in time and tell my high school self these things…

Anyway, happy anniversary, thanks for having me, and rock on!

Thanks, Jen!

xoxo,

Liz & Lisa

If you're not already, you should be following Jen Lancaster's hilarious and refreshingly honest blog, Jennsylvania. And be on the look out for her upcoming book, Jeneration X: One Reluctant Adult's Attempt to Unarrest Her Arrested Development; Or, Why It's Never Too Late for Her Dumb Ass to Learn Why Froot Loops Are Not for Dinner.

 

Holy Photoshopping! Adele editon by Liz

We've all been guilty of it.  Wishing our ass was smaller, our boobs bigger, our post-baby tummies devoid of that unyielding flat tire. (Damn that flat tire!) Often times you'll hear me say, I'd be really happy if I could just lose just five more pounds.  And then after losing them, guess what?  I feel like I need to lose five more.  Long story short: women are incredibly hard on themselves. (And on each other, but that's a whole other blog in itself!)

Which is why I love when someone like Adele comes along. Talented, beautiful and not a size 2, she disproves the notion that sexy only comes in a few sizes. Sweeping the Grammys, she rocked the house when she performed in her beautiful and form-fitting black dress.  And she was going to be on the cover of Vogue in March!  Wow, a plus-size woman on the cover?  Amazing! I was elated.

Until I saw the cover.

My first thought?  Who the F is that and what did they do with Adele?  My second thought? Can I hire Vogue's photoshopper to work on my Christmas card next year?  DAMN!

Yes, she looks UH-Amazing. But it doesn't look like her.  And what bothers me is that NO ONE in the world seems to give a shit about her size except the editors at Vogue.  Certainly not the millions of fans like me who love her music.  Her pure talent outweighs any of that bullshit.  She got her heart ripped out by someone, just like we all have at one time or another, and made some incredible music out of it. (Take that, asshole who smashed her heart in two!)  WHO CARES how much she weighs.

And why in the hell did Vogue book her if they were planning on throwing her in a corset and photoshopping the crap of her anyway?  What is the point of making someone look like a completely DIFFERENT person?  Yes, she looks hot.  But I think she would have looked just as hot had they lost the freakin' corset and just let her show herself exactly the way she is.

Woman in general already struggle so much with body image. Even the most beautiful girls are taught to hate something about themselves, and I believe that cropping the bejesus out of Adeles's arm sends a terrible message to our daughters.  You're not worthy unless you like this.  You can be a RIDICULOUSLY talented singer but all that matter is the size of your ASS. Really?  We've evolved as a society so much, yet women are still  judged, not by their accomplishments, but by their dress size. Makes. Me. CRAZY. When will we learn to love ourselves?

So there. *steps off soapbox* I'd like to know what YOU think.  Do you think Vogue went too far?  Or are you happy they gave Adele a anorexic makeover?  Tell me!

xoxo, Liz

 

 

 

Lauren Baratz-Logsted's 5 Loves and a Dud

The inner teenage in us jumps with joy for good YA.  Especially Liz-she's the biggest YA whore this side of the Mississippi. Maybe it's all those Sweet Valley High's she devoured in middle school or all the Judy Blume novels she read over and over.  Either way, she's a sucker for YA! So we're excited to have the lovely Lauren Baratz-Logsted sharing her 5 Loves and a Dud.  And don't worry, if YA isn't your bag, she writes adult fiction too!  In fact, her latest, The Bro-Magnet sounds really fabulous! But today we're highlighting Little Women And Me.

Here's the dealio on Little Women and Me: Emily is sick and tired of being a middle sister. So when she gets an assignment to describe what she'd change about a classic novel, Emily pounces on Little Women. After all, if she can't change things in her own family, maybe she can bring a little justice to the March sisters. (Kill off Beth? Have cute Laurie wind up with Amy instead of Jo? What was Louisa May Alcott thinking?!) But when Emily gets mysteriously transported into the 1860s world of the book, she discovers that righting fictional wrongs won't be easy. And after being immersed in a time and place so different from her own, it may be Emily-not the four March sisters-who undergoes the most surprising change of all.

Sound good? Then leave a comment yo!  We have FIVE copies to give away.  We'll choose the winners on February 19th after 6pm PST. Good luck!

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS...LAUREN BARATZ-LOGSTED'S 5 LOVES AND A DUD

5 LOVES

 

1. General Hospital. I've watched on and off for 33 years. It's my daily break from writing and I still get caught up in the storylines, no matter how insane. It was just revealed that Johnny's dead sister Claudia was really his mother...even though the actress who played Claudia is only four years older than the actor who plays Johnny - how crazy is that???

2. Adele. As I'm writing this, the Grammy Awards were just given out the night before with Adele winning all six awards she was nominated for. Not only is she an amazing singer, but her very existence and success are proof positive that a woman doesn't have to diet her way down to waif status or do anything but just sing brilliantly to succeed.

3. Toenail polish. Yes, to some that might sound like a minor thing. But for someone like me who wears almost no makeup - except for eyebrow pencil so I'll actually have eyebrows and lipstick in winter so I don't look like the possessed girl from The Exorcist - having pretty toenails is a very big deal. Right now they're sparkly.

4. My cat, Yoyo. I've had seven other cats before Yoyo over the course of my life, and I've never seen a cat do the things he does. Just to give two examples out of many, one time, when he couldn't get to his litter box because someone had closed the door to that room, we caught him straddling the toilet because he didn't want to leave a mess on the floor. The other thing is that no matter how long my daughter might hold on to him and no matter how awkward the position, he never bites or scratches or tries to get away from her, even when the expression on his face is one of "Seriously? Oh, the indignities!"

5. Reading. Need I tell you why?

DUD

Elitists. Just because something is popular doesn't mean it's good. But by the same token, just because something is popular it doesn't mean it's automatically bad either. And it just makes me crazy when I come across someone who is across-the-board against everything - be it books, TV, film, or music - that's popular. It always seems to me like people like that doth protest too much. And then it makes me want to say, "Insecure much?" And then that makes me want to say, "Fine. You just sit there with your Dom Perignon and your sushi and your PBS documentary on the history of the doorknob. I'll just stay right here with Yoyo on my lap, eating Cheetos and watching GH."

Thanks Lauren! xoxo, L&L

To learn more about Lauren, head on over to her website or find her on Twitter.

Every writing retreat needs a one-man band by Liz & Lisa

Our second writing retreat was last weekend in Huntington Beach, CA!

You might be wondering...why do we call it a retreat if we're holed up in a hotel room for 48 hours, ahem, working.

(Or maybe that's just our husbands!)

(And maybe we shouldn't have tweeted so many pictures of the sunset from our ocean front balcony.)

Maybe the word retreat makes us feel better because it sounds like a place you go where the words flow freely, the ideas come full force and the characters rise off the page.

(And you won't get in a knock-out-drag-out with your writing partner over a plot point.)

Here's what we do know.

50,000 words are now written for our third MS. And we're excited. Details to come soon, we promise...

And because you're always so supportive, we're giving away a $20 iTunes gift card. Just leave a comment to be entered to win. We'll randomly select the winner on Monday, February 6 after 6pm PST.

So here's what we learned. (Cause y'all know we always learn quite a bit- at these things. Most of which has very little to do with writing!)

1. You can listen to the same song on replay for forty-eight hours straight. Lisa would like to personally thank Debbie Gibson for the role she played. Who knew Lost in Your Eyes could be so inspiring! And Liz would like to thank Sarah Bareilles' for her live rendition of Gravity. (Liz's is so much cooler!)

(In Lisa's defense, Debbie was bringing her back to that mind space she needed to be in- that high-waisted jeans and Strawberry Boons mind space. We'll fill you in soon. Promise.)

2. You can survive on beef jerky for two days.

(And cheese and crackers.)

(And supermarket sushi.)

(But not rice chips- gag.)

And Lisa would just like to take this moment to thank gawd that Slim Jims were not involved this time. (See last retreat.)

3. A one-man band (with a mustache) can sound (and look) really good after a long day of writing

Fire pit. Check.

Glass of wine. Check.

One dude with a harmonica wedged between his lips, a guitar strapped across his body and a keyboard not far away- who can, and we repeat can channel Elton John-if you really listen. Check.

4. There is such a thing as service that is too good

Ring, ring. The light outside your hotel room door is flickering. Someone will be right up.

Ring, ring. We'd like to bring up two bite sized chocolates to put on your pillow.

Ring, ring. There's a guy with a mustache singing tunes down by the fire. We'll pay you to come down here.

Maybe we should've stayed at the Hampton Inn...

5. Everyone in California is gorgeous (When you live elsewhere.) Lisa had forgotten how good looking everyone is in SoCal. (Or the cold has frozen her brain and her judgement.) Either way, from the guys who parked the car to man at the front desk, every male looked like he stepped out of Surfer magazine and every woman like she just walked off a photo shoot. She especially wanted to explain to the incredibly hot and far too young for her-Abercrombie & Fitch model look-a-like- (a.k.a, the bell hop), I like men. I do, as he eyed her and Liz suspiciously as they rode up the elevator to their shared room.

xoxo,

Liz & Lisa

 

 

The Cell Phone Lot by Stephanie Elliot

Blow up the balloons! Cue the streamers! Break out that bubbly- stat!  MaNiC MoMMy (a.k.a. Stephanie Elliot) is in 'da house sharing the news about her short story, The Cell Phone Lot (available today!). It's a fabulous, fast-paced and funny story about chance encounters. (We love the premise!) And not only is she here, but she's taking over. We've given her the reins (which y'all know we don't do that often) and told her to run this show. So without further adieu, heeeere's Stephanie!

Just one more thing--because you know we're control freaks--she's giving away 5 copies  of The Cell Phone Lot! Details below... Okay, we're really leaving now. Promise!

Okay, really, we mean it this time, heeeere's Stephanie!

The Cell Phone Lot is a short story I wrote between Christmas and New Year’s when my husband and I were flying from Arizona to Ohio to go to my grandmother’s funeral. Being at the airport just sparks imagination, and while there, I recalled a time I was waiting in a cell phone lot, and the idea snuck into my mind. The story came pouring out then, and I wrote these 65 pages really fast.

This little story is all about chance encounters, fate and taking risks in your life. And I truly do believe that every person we come in contact with has been placed in our “life timeline” for a reason, that nothing is random, and everything has a specific purpose. Whether it is to cheer someone up in line while waiting at the post office, to offer a suggestion to a new mother at the park, or to meet your soul mate, I think every contact we make with another human being is purposeful and with reason. This is what I believe fate to be. When I met my husband, I was 20 and he was 21. We were both attending Northern Illinois University. I was heading out with my roommates to go to the bar we frequented. It was a Friday night, early, like 6 p.m. and we usually didn’t go out that early. We wanted to get there to grab a table, but the bar was packed because of some fraternity event.

So we were waiting around until a table opened up, drinking our dollar drafts (yes, back then they only cost one dollar!). A table opened up and two football players went for the same one we were eyeing. I didn’t care for football at all, wasn’t impressed that the guys were big football jocks, but I wanted to get a table, and one of the guys was kind of cute. We argued with them a bit that we got to the table first, and then the five of us agreed to share it.

The guy at the table bought me a beer, shared his pizza, kissed me at another bar later that night, and became my husband and the father of my three kids. We’ll have been married 19 freaking years in May. That’s still crazy to think about because he and I both still feel like we are those college kids back in 1990.

The fateful thing about our chance encounter on February 2, 1990 (Wow, I just realized I met him on the day The Cell Phone Lot is coming out! How’s THAT for fate – 22 years to the day!)… the neatest thing about our story is that there are so many chances for us to have NOT met that night, and also so many chances for us to have met previously. But it was THAT night that was supposed to be THE night for us.

We discovered that when I was a freshman, we had a math class together. We probably had been to the same parties. I knew some of his closest friends – even typed papers for one of his best friends. Had I met him any other time, there would have been no way we’d ever been together forever. Yeah, we might have hooked up earlier during college – to have our relationship outlast the four years of college? No way. We needed that time to grow and become the people we were when we met that night.

And I could have totally missed him the night we met. Let’s say my roommates weren’t ready to leave when we left for the bar, or we didn’t see the table become available, or one of our fake IDs didn’t work that night? There were so many components that led to us meeting that night, that it was completely meant to be.

This is why I love stories about fate, and love, and risk-taking and chance encounters.

With The Cell Phone Lot, I wanted to create two people who might not otherwise ever meet and have them want to be together so badly but to have some major obstacles get in the way.

Grant is at the cell phone lot to pick up a woman he’s going to meet for the first time that he ‘met’ through an online dating service when he meets Bridge in the cell phone lot. She’s also waiting to pick up someone at the airport. They are attracted to each other instantly, and their attraction is palpable.

Their relationship unfolds in the airport as the flights they’re waiting for are delayed by bad weather. It’s anybody’s guess as to what happens – if this chance encounter has fate arriving for them, or if they’ll have separate departures … never to see one another again.

I’d love to give away five copies here, and for those who don’t win it, it’s only 99 cents on Amazon.

Think about where you are now and who you’re with – what led you to this place in your life? Was it a chance encounter? Fate? Was the timing absolutely perfect that any little glitch in the planning and you would have never met? I’d love to hear your story in the comment section for a chance to win one of the five ebooks we’re giving away here!

And thanks Liz and Lisa for hosting me on Chick Lit is Not Dead!

To find out more about Stephanie Elliot, visit her website.

Thanks, Stephanie! xoxo,

L&L

(Fine print: We'll randomly select the winners of The Cell Phone Lot on Monday, February 6 after 6pm PST.)

I'm just not that into you (anymore):Project Runway

Liz here. I think y'all know I have a hard time with the word NO. But it's especially true when it comes to my DVR-I just can't say no to all those shiny and new Fall shows.  But there's always a few that get dumped before I even watch one episode, (sorry 2 Broke Girls!) and a few that I can't WAIT to sink my teeth into each week (Helloooo Once Upon A Time).

But just like any relationship, sometimes things go sour with even the best of shows.

You know how it is-things start off and you're just so excited to see them.  You think about them when they're not around, you talk about them incessantly to anyone who will listen.  You may even get irrationally angry when others block you from seeing them. (Um, yeah, sorry about that, Mike!) Then, things may start to cool off a little.  They seem to get comfortable and stop caring about how they look.  Or maybe they start trying a bunch of new things that, well, are LAME.  All of a sudden it's been two, maybe three weeks since you've seen them. And before you can say Queer Eye For the Straight Guy, your former favorite show has become (gasp!) irrelevant!

And yes, Project Runway, I'm talkin' to you.  Like Desperate Housewives, Grey's Anatomy, Chuck and Lost before you, I'm thinking of dumping your ass.

I LOVED Project Runway.  Like put the kids to bed, order sushi and force my husband to watch, LOVED it.  Christian Siriano made my heart sing and Mondo's F'ed up patterns intrigued me. I didn't even mind that Heidi Klum seemed to be pregnant every fucking season.  Hell, I even stuck with them when they moved over to Lifetime without High Def  TV and watched that terrible Models of the Runway spinoff!  Because even though I could barely see what the hell they had made without HD, I didn't care.  I was there for the DRAMA. So when they announced Project Runway All-Stars, I was jumping up and down with joy.

All my fave designers!  In ONE show!  How could they go wrong? How could they mess up PERFECTION?

Well, they did. Let me count the ways.....

But wait, before we get into all that, I've got a copy of Gunn's Golden Rules by Tim Gunn.  Just leave a comment and I'll choose a lucky winner on Sunday January 29th after 6pm PST.  Good luck!

WHY I'M JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU(ANYMORE):PROJECT RUNWAY

1. The poor man's Heidi Klum Where the F is Heidi Klum and who is this imposter they have hosting the show?  I sincerely hope that she's not as uncomfortable being on TV as I am watching her on it. Make the cringing stop. Please. And she doesn't even say that German bullshit at the very end when the designer gets kicked to the curb.  WTF! 

And while we're on the subject of Miss Klum, so freakin' bummed to hear about her and Seal.  I really was buying in to their whole perfect relationship thing. *cue mental image of Seal serenading Heidi with Kiss From a Rose each night*

2. The New Judges Where is my boyfriend Micheal Kors and his barbs?  Nina Garcia's knowing smirk? And Isaac Mizrahi as a replacement?  Really? That's the best you could come up with? And don't even get me started on the fact that MISS PIGGY was a guest judge last week. Because she's a fashion EXPERT. Come on!

3. That British chick Okay, what the hell happened to Tim Gunn and who is this bitchy Brit with the bad haircut?  Her utter disdain while in the workroom makes me uncomfortable. And not in a good Real Housewives of Atlanta sort of way.

4. The Designers Between April's gray hair and Austin Scarlett's scarf and bolo fixation, I'm not feelin' my fave designers.  Where is Kenley's cattiness? Why isn't anyone talking shit on Michael? When did Rami learn to do something other than draping? Where is the DRAMA?  Do they really think we actually tune in for the designs?  Jesus, I haven't been able to see them clearly anyway the last few years!

5. High Definition TV  Sooooo...the lesson here is to be careful what you wish for.  I lamented the last three seasons about the lack of HDTV on Lifetime.  But little did I know how disconcerting it would be to actually see my favorite designers so UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL.  Did Mila always look so sweaty in the workroom? Was Kenley's lipstick always that red?  Did Micheal's eyebrows look like that before? It's creepin' me out.

So I'm sorry Project Runway, it's been real.  But I just moved you below Spongebob on my DVR playlist.  And we all know what that means-You're out. Auf Wiedersehen!  Oh, and Top Chef?  I'm officially putting you on notice.

What about you?  Any shows you are dumping this season?  Tell me!

xoxo, Liz

 

5 (More) reasons I still watch The Bachelor

 "On a scale of one to 10, I feel like I'm gonna throw up."

Ah, it's highly intelligent statements like this one (among many other reasons coming up in a minute) that keep me watching The Bachelor every week. This is my personal favorite from last night. Spoken by Jaclyn who was upset over the possibility of the cocktail-party-crashing mystery guest getting a rose...

Confession:  Bachelor Ben Flajnik is starting to grow on me just a wee bit. He still needs an effing haircut like nobody's bidness (could his sister not point that out to him???), but there's something about him. He seems, dare I suggest, normal? Well, normal by reality show standards anyway. (And we have to admit he looked pretty good skiing with his shirt off... and did you see the part where he played the piano? *swoon*)

Or perhaps I'm no better than any of the women on the show- I'm simply caught up in the moment, the rose on the table staring me down- making me believe that he. Is. The. One.

But regardless of how I feel about Bachelor Ben, let's face it- he's not what makes The Bachelor a Monday night must-watch- it's the catty, backstabbing, tight (and bad- does anyone else agree?) dress wearing, crying, idiotic statement spewing women who have us pulling up a couch cushion each week.

And as I watched last night, I found myself giddy with excitement yet again. Even though I've seen it all before- even though it's the same Bachelor just a different name. Even though it's the same cocktail party showdowns and tearful exits. Even though it's a total formula-  It never gets old. And I decided that because five reasons I still watch The Bachelor just weren't enough, here are five more. (PS: Be sure to leave a comment about why you watch- or why you don't- and be entered to win a copy of FLY AWAY HOME by fellow Bachelor watcher, Jennifer Weiner. We'll randomly select the winner after 6p.m. PST on Sunday, Jan 22. )

1. The crazy declarations

If we conquer our fear of heights together, we can do anything! (Said by Ben after he climbs the San Francisco Bay bridge with his date, Emily.) Who cares that they've only known each other for two and a half minutes? They've climbed up to a really high place together so they can survive marriage! WTF?

When I walk through the door tonight, I'm going to fall in love with Ben quickly.  These girls are going to hate me but I'm willing to take the risk because he's (Ben's) someone I want to be with for the rest of my life. Spoken by a mystery guest who crashes the cocktail party. Oh and BTW, she doesn't know Ben at all. See #2

2. The (uninvited) mystery guest

I love the drama as the mystery guest is slowly revealed. The hands on the steering wheel. The voice mail left for Chris (Harrison). The legs getting out of the car. The reaction of the girls when she enters the cocktail party. WHO. THE. *#&%. IS. THAT. GIRL? Well, last night it was Shawntel (or whatsherbutt as model, Courtney, so affectionately called her). You remember funeral director Shawntel from Brad's season? Well poor Shawntel's crazy declaration didn't prove true- she didn't get the rose or the love. (And let's face it, had she stayed, the girls would've likely killed her or at the very least beaten her to a freakin' pulp.) But what she did get were a lot of fun comments like:  she's uglier in person and her thighs are thicker than mine (spoken by the SAME girl). The guys she dates go on dates where she draws people's bloodWe don't re-use Brad's dumpster trash And my personal favorite: She rode in here on her high Hearse *cue cymbal*

3. The dates

Scaling the San Francisco Bay Bridge, a private concert by Matt Nathanson, a piano duet. And that was just one date with one girl- Emily. Oh, to be a reality show contestant... *Swoon* To fall in love to the glow of the camera lights. To make out with six producers watching you. To go on one unrealistic date after the next making your expectations so high that it will be virtually impossible to succeed in love in the real world. Wait, maybe I'm wrong. Apparently if you do a death defying stunt together, you'll have no issues living under the same roof, sharing money or raising kids! (See #1). Plus, on what other show can you watch women skiing the streets of San Francisco in their bikinis?

4. Chris Harrison

Gotta love the man. He's got the greatest gig in TV.  He probably makes a sh*t load of money and he's only on the air for about five minutes each week. Although last night he actually got about six minutes because he greeted the mystery guest (told her to freshen up?! See #5) and had to come out a second time to establish that Ben was about to give out the final rose of the evening. (Erika went down hard like a sack of potatoes temporarily halting the rose ceremony.)

5. Jennifer Weiner's live tweets

As if we didn't already love this New York Times bestselling novelist enough for writing fabulous book after fabulous book (can't wait for her upcoming release, The Next Best Thing) she also live tweets The Bachelor! @Jenniferweiner And she's hilarious. (Trust me, her tweets alone are reason enough to watch the show.) Some of my favorites:

She's got thicker thighs than me. She's uglier in person. Wow. Did the meanest girl get a free spray tan? #thebachelor

Hmph. Ben declines to hand out the final rose. Jaclyn's crying like she lost a limb. Or an implant. Something important. #thebachelor

When I'm in charge of everything, The Bachelor will be on every night

And one reason I might have to stop watching...

The tonsil hockey

WTF? Really Ben? I don't know about you, but it wouldn't be a turn on if Ben told me I was the best kisser in the house. Then kissed me again and told me it was still true. Aren't we missing something here? This means he's sticking his tongue down a lot of throats. #gagmewithaspoon

xoxo,

Lisa

 

Kate Rockland's 5 Loves and a Dud

Weight.  We're a country obsessed with it.  We have magazine cover devoted to it.  Some of us (Liz!) talk about it constantly. So when we saw that Kate Rockland's next novel was titled 150 Pounds, well, we knew we had to get our hands on it ASAP! We're thrilled that Kate's returning to the site today(we crowned her as our VERY FIRST Lit IT Girl last year!) to share her 5 Loves a Dud.  We think you'll find them as hilarious and insightful as her novels, even if now we're a bit scared to visit New Jersey. (um, total California girls over here!) Regardless, we think you'll love her latest, 150 Pounds.  It's fabulous and fun-it's a must read for all you weight obsessers (don't deny-we know you do it too!).

Here's the scoopage on 150 Pounds: In the fast paced life of blogging, two women stand out: Alexis Allbright, of Skinny Chick, and Shoshana Weiner, who writes Fat and Fabulous. Both have over five million loyal readers. Both are hungry for success. But the similarities stop there.

With over 100 pounds on the scale separating them, weight isn't their only difference. Alexis is a loner who is so bitchy the only person who can stand her company is her gay best friend Billy. She gives neurotic New Yorkers a run for their money with her strict daily workout routine, and weighing of food. Shoshana is Alexis’s opposite. Living in Jersey with rowdy roommates, she is someone who “collects friends,” as her mother puts it; and treasures a life of expanding circles...and waistlines.

When both appear as panelists on a popular talk show, their lives intersect in ways neither could have imagined. In turns comedic, heartwarming—and familiar to any woman who's ever stepped on a scale—Alexis and Shoshana realize they have far more in common than either could have possibly imagined, and more importantly, something to offer.

Sound fun? Then leave a comment and you'll be entered on of FIVE copies.  We'll choose the winner after 6pm PST on Sunday January 22nd.  Good Luck!

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS...KATE ROCKLAND'S 5 LOVES AND A DUD

1. Other People’s Weddings I know everyone likes to complain about having to book hotel rooms, buy silver bridesmaid shoes, or stop eating their lobster to stand up when a couple gets announced as husband and wife for the first time. Me? I frickin’ love weddings. From the moment I get the invitation in the mail and affix it to my fridge, to stumbling back to my room buzzed off the free champagne, I have had a ball at every wedding I’ve ever been lucky enough to be invited to. I love noting which traditions the bride and groom included or discarded, love embarrassing speeches by fathers when they tear up, love the surprise of which appetizers and entrees a couple chose when they’re placed before me, and I especially love the moment the bride enters the room, chapel, church, synagogue, or beach to walk down the aisle and everyone sucks in their breath at how beautiful she looks. As you can imagine, I started planning my own wedding the minute I met my husband. My friend Marissa used to joke she was afraid to open my bedroom closet, lest six wedding dresses fall out.

2. Coffee Some people have a morning exercise routine. I have a morning coffee routine. From the minute I wake up, I start looking forward to my medium hazelnut, extra cream, and two sugars. I go to a local café four blocks from my apartment. I know the owner, and we usually chat for a few minutes each day. This gives me hope, that should I ever die and my husband doesn’t notice, this store owner will call the police and not let my cat eat my face off. I don’t mind standing in line, as I usually do a heaping dose of people-watching. I like imagining what profession everyone is in, where they’re running off to. I try and spy on people working on their laptops, to see what they’re typing. I like the sacks of beans that decorate the store, and the funny names of the beans like “Obama blend.” That first sip is heaven.

3. Cranky Northern New Jerseyans and New Yorkers  I lived in Colorado once and didn’t trust anyone I met. They were too earnest, too helpful, too laid-back. After two years I hastily packed my bags and moved home to the East Coast. I’m from Northern New Jersey, right across the river from Manhattan. People here tell it like it is. If you’re acting like an asshole, people will tell you. If you leave your car double-parked too long on the street, someone will smash in your window. That’s just the way it is. I don’t trust friendly people, and when I travel, I miss loud Jersey women who can make you laugh in five minutes. I like it that if someone falls on the sidewalk in Manhattan, no one helps them up. I mean really, get better walking shoes. I keep thinking my husband and I have to move to the suburbs, but I’m terrified of someone breaking into our house. My family thinks I’m crazy; aren’t I scared to live in a city? I’m not. I like that there’s always someone standing outside their building smoking, or walking down the street in front of me. No one’s ever bothered me in the city. I don’t trust the rest of the country. I feel like there’s never been a serial killer from New Jersey.

4. The Smell of My Son After a Bath Because one of my son’s favorite pastimes is smushing avocado into his ears, digging in the dirt with his fingers, or sticking banana up his nose, by the end of the day the kid needs a bath. I don’t so much enjoy the act of giving him a bath, as it’s physically draining to lift him in and out of the tub, fill it with fancy California Baby soap, stick in all his colorful bath toys, undress him, and lay out his bath towel. However, the end result is divine; the day gets washed away, and all the minor stresses I’ve had melt when I kneel down and make sure he has no toe lint between his toes from his socks. I love how his hair gets a tiny curl to it after a bath, and how his skin shines like pearls, the avocado gets removed from his ears, and his skin smells simply divine. I like that even though I don’t always get it right when it comes to mommyhood, I can give my son this small gift of a bath every night, and send him off to sleep clean and happy.

5. Reading a Murder Mystery Some of my favorite mystery writers, P.D. James, Elizabeth George, and Ngaio Marsh my mom got me into from high school on. I love nothing more then settling down into bed and scaring the bejezus out of myself. I know it’s a genre I could never write, and that fascinates me. To be a mystery writer one has to know not only how to solve puzzles, but how to come up with the original puzzle in the first place, one that hasn’t been penned already by another author. Figuring out plot extends to other pop culture loves I have, like watching The Closer or seeing a really good film with a winding plot. I like characters that might not be who they seem. When I was younger, there were times I needed to know who the murderer was so badly I’d cut class and sit on the toilet in the ladies’ room, hastily speed-reading through the pages. My husband teases me because I sometimes will scan the last page of a mystery novel to make sure I’m on the right track as to who the killer is, and then I’m bummed out when I’m right. I’m getting better at resisting this urge.

DUD

Couples Buying Homes on HGTV’s “House Hunters” I’m addicted to HGTV’s show “House Hunters.” Mainly, because I can’t afford to buy a house. It’s also why I read fashion magazines, and consider whether the $1200 Marc Jacobs sweater would look good with my skin tone: It’s a fantasy. However, the couples who agree to be filmed as they buy their dream home really piss me off. They seem to have no concept what “small” is, to start. I have been living in a 650 square foot-apartment with two other people and a shy cat for six years. We have closets narrower then my body if I stand with my back to them, which are so jam packed there is one in the living room that no longer opens. Nothing makes me angrier then when I watch a couple stroll into a four-bedroom house in Texas and state that the walk-in closet off the master bedroom is “too small.” Girl, that closet is the size of my entire apartment. How much space do Americans think they need? Someday I’ll move into a house and it’s going to feel like a castle, no matter what size it is. And I won’t complain about the size of my walk-in closet. At least the door will open.

Thanks Kate! xoxo, L&L

To read more about Kate, head on over to her website or find her on Facebook or Twitter.

My So-Called Resolutions by Liz

It's that time of year again. Time for my so-called resolutions.

I found myself, New Years morning, fingers poised on my keyboard as I tried to write an Facebook-worthy resolution status.  The usual suspects came to mind, I'm going to me more positive, I'm going to lose ten pounds, etc...And even though there were tons of things I wanted to improve about myself (hello, self hate!), I had a damn hard time coming up with something Facebook worthy.  The only thing that made me feel better?  I had finally learned how to spell the word resolution without using spell check.  Check that off the 2011 list please!

But after some very deep soul searching, I've come up with my 2012 list. And I want to hear about yours too!  Leave me a comment and I'll enter you to win an ARC of Spin by Catherine McKenzie.  I'll choose the winner on January 15th after 6pm PST.

LIZ'S SO CALLED 2012 RESOLUTIONS

1. Make more time for the things I love Is there an available fairy godmother out there?  Because I need to make a few more hours in the day. I struggled in 2011 to find time to write-something I'm determined to change in 2012.  One step in the right direction?  The BOSE noise cancelling headphones I got last month.  They're so awesome that the house could be F'ing burning down around me and I wouldn't hear shit.  But, at last I'll finally have that peace and quiet I've been craving to get some writing done.

2. Get my funny back Where the F*CK has it been? I blame a lack of trashy reality TV watching on my part-something I vow to correct ASAP. (You hear that, Dance Moms?)  And anyway, considering this is an election year, I'm going to need all the funny I can get! *cue a million ridiculously annoying campaign ads*

3. Read MORE  Yes, gi-normous TBR pile, I'm talking to you. I'm going to make you my bitch in 2012.  Consider yourself warned.

4. Get in shape    *snorts*  I know, I know.  But if you count carrying three grocery bags on each arm once a week weight training, then at least I'm doing something, right?

5. Skip the fad diets Last month, that freakin' HCG diet made me a horrible, hungry ogre who wanted to gnaw on her husband's arm like a hambone.  And those annoying people who claimed they were NEVER HUNGRY while on it?  LIARS!!!  Instead? I downloaded Net Diary, an AWESOME app that helps you track your calories.  The anal type-A control freak in me is jumping up and down that I can count every single morsel that enters my mouth in 2012.  Except for that BLT with avocado my drunken alter ego devoured at 1am in Vegas last weekend.  But let's just pretend that never happened....

Bonus so-called resolution: 

Finish our next book- This one's easy.  At almost 40,000 words and a writing retreat coming up later this month, we should be ready to shop it by March.  Want a quick peek at the premise?  Hmmm...All I'll say is that it's about two childhood best friends who get themselves in a sticky situation and it's called The Toast. You'll have to wait on the rest!

*raises glass* Here's to a great 2012!  I hope it's your best year EVER!  xoxo, Liz

 

 

Cooper Lawrence's 5 Loves and a Dud

Can you guys believe it's 2012 already?  And since this may or may not be the final year of our existence according to that pesky Mayan calendar, we better make it count by reading LOTS of awesome books! We'll be switching things up a bit this year-look for lots of pop culture talk (The Bachelor, anyone?) and more shit-talking posts from us.(And we want to hear from you too!)

And of course, all the VERY best authors and giveaways.  Because that's how we roll in 2012, bitches!

We're kicking off the New Year with the fabulous Cooper Lawrence and her latest, The Yoga Club.  Cooper is our type of multi-tasker-not only does she co-host The Big Show with Scott & Todd in New York, you can also catch her on Fox's Dish Nation.  She's also written several other books.  See?  Serious Multi-tasker! And she does it well-The Yoga Club is a lot of fun-the perfect way for you to kick off 2012!

Here's the skinny on The Yoga Club: Chatting it up with bendy WASPs is the last thing on Coco Guthrie’s mind during her 8:30 a.m. yoga class. Having made her fortune as the world-renowned inventor of Butt-B-Gone derriere cream, Coco still doesn’t feel like she belongs among the upper class— until she attends the swankiest Halloween soiree in Greenwich, Connecticut, where three of her fellow morning yogis shared her brilliant idea to appear as Sarah Palin. Soon it’s clear that a love of stretching isn’t all this accidental sorority—which includes a single mom with echolalia, an entertainment reporter who charms the pants off handsome stars, and a drama-prone producer with a taste for drag— have in common.

When the four mischievous Sarahs wander away from the party to sneak a peek at the mayor’s neighboring estate, they are stunned to find him adorned in leather and latex, and rolling up a woman’s body in a Persian rug. To make matters worse, someone has spotted the spying Palins. Someone who threatens to expose their torrid affairs in business and the bedroom. Now the unlikely foursome must use all their wits and wiles to get to the bottom of the kinky crime. But will their budding friendship be strong enough to protect their deepest secrets?

Sound good?  Well then you'll be stoked to know we have FIVE copies to give away!  You know the drill-just leave a comment and we'll randomly choose the winners after 6pm PST on Monday January 9th.  Good luck!

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENT...COOPER LAWRENCE'S 5 LOVES AND A DUD

1. Thick and thin friends.  No, no, not your friends with canckles and food issues, but the ones who go through it with you…and I mean….ALL OF IT! My closest friends are people I have known for twenty years or more who know me better than I know myself, will call me on my “stuff”, and are people I have relied on at various times in my life without question. As Marlene Dietrich said, “It's the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter.”

2. Marconi, the inventor and the puppy. Since I have spent the bulk of my career in radio I would be remiss not to be grateful for Guglielmo Marconi, an Italian inventor, known as the father of long distance radio transmission.  Radio is my second love, the first being my 96lb Italian Spinone puppy aptly named….you guessed it…Marconi (which is only funny if you know I’m in radio). What makes my Marconi special is that he is a pet therapy dog through the Delta Society. We visit at our local hospital on a weekly basis and its great to see him working with the patients.

3. The greatest channel on TV.  Investigation Discovery Hollywood crimes, murder and forensic investigations, oh my! When you’re relaxing on your couch and eating dinner, what’s better than watching a cold case solved by DNA of an assailant’s 30 year old semen? I can't get enough of Deadly Women, Wicked Attraction, and Solved: Extreme Forensics.  In this one episode they had to get the help of a NASA scientist…but I don’t want to ruin for you. If you don’t get the ID: Investigation Discovery channel, call your local cable provider.

4. Living in NYC. I would love to regale you with stories of the hustle and the bustle, or the museums and cocktail soirees on exotic rooftops but my real love for this city is that anything can be delivered to you at any time of the day. Groceries, burritos, laundry, furniture, shoes…you name it they’ll bring it. You don’t have to get out of your sweatpants….ever!

5. Being Single. Read the first four. Is it any shock?

DUD

WAR. No disrespect to them but I got their greatest hits for Christmas and I was really underwhelmed. “Spill The Wine” is ok once it gets to the chorus but the whole spoken word thing that leads up to it is so hacky.

Thanks so much Cooper! xoxo, L&L

To read more about Cooper, head on over to her website or find her on Facebook or Twitter.

5 Reasons I still watch The Bachelor

Dear, The Bachelor, I hope this isn't too forward. But I f*cking love the sh*t out of you. To clarify, I don't mean you, the bachelor, as in Brad (gag) or Jake (double gag) or even Ben (you should cut your shaggy mop, but you are growing on me.)- but the show. The glorious cat-fights, the endless streams of tears, the ridiculous stunts, the bad (make that really bad) prom dresses and that's just the premier episode.

I'm addicted.

The rejected Bachelors and Bachelorettes are obviously addicted too- many now coming back for a second beating more after having their hearts broken on national TV. Like our latest, Ben Flanjik.

And c'mon, admit it, you're just a little bit addicted too... (I see your comments on Facebook and Twitter!)

Who cares that I'm pushing forty. That I had to wait until the kids went to bed to watch because the content of the show is just that wrong. That I sat by myself with a large glass of wine rubbing my hands together maniacally waiting for the opening credits to start. That my husband has even thrown in the towel after many seasons of (not so) secretly watching by my side. (Brad and his therapist did him in.) I'll always be a loyal fan. I'll always watch you.

Here are the five reasons why I'll never stop...

1. The drama. Omg. It never ceases to amaze. Do these women not watch the previous seasons? Do they not get that drama is not the answer to securing a rose and landing the bachelor? All I have to say is thank gawd they don't.  And thank gawd for the free-flowing alcohol that the show provides them.

2. The crazies. I know she's technically one of my own, but the blogger. Jenna. OMG. She brings hot mess to a whole new level getting into an argument with another woman and saying the seven words I was quite certain I'd NEVER  hear in my life: Maybe. We. Can. Share. A. Tampon. Sometime.

WTF? (I think I'll be asking that a lot this season!)

And in the most dramatic rose ceremony ever, (I'm sure Chris Harrison would agree as, isn't every rose ceremony the most dramatic?) she pries herself off the bathroom floor where she was crying hysterically about not following her own advice that she blogs about- and gets a rose. But of course she does. She only adds to the dramz. See #1.

3. The unexpected. The horse! The bacon! The grandma! And that was just last night.

Lindzi rides in on a horse and secures the first impression rose. And of course prompts one of the women (the model- who looks like she's going to be CRAZY this season) to say,  f*ck her and the horse she rode in on.

Amber B. (a.k.a. Amber Bacon) offers Ben a taste! (No one likes bacon that much. No one.)

And Brittney brings her sweet, 72-year-old grandmother who raised her. (A brilliant play, btw!)  And who, even though she is SEVENTY TWO, is apparently not safe from bashing (is nothing sacred?). The catty women can't hold back even for a little old lady- talking shit on grams and her wrinkly skin. Two words: Eff. Them.

4. The wine. Oh this part is all about me even though two Bachelors have been in the wine biz- Andrew Firestone and now, Ben Flanjik. I'm referring to what goes on in my own living room as I watch. A nice deep pour from a nice bottle of red just makes it all even more delicious. Oh, and it doesn't hurt that the women seem to drink a sh*t load of it too.

5. The love. What can I say? I'm a hopeless romantic. And they do fall- so madly and deeply-as they hold each other tight in their bathing suits (or as this season's promo promises, in their birthday suits). And I am rooting for them- all of them. Even the ones that gross me out like the high-waisted pants wearing CRAZY pilot Jake. Because there's someone for everyone. Right, Vienna?

And before I go, here's the woman who would've gotten the first impression rose from me last night (because I can't totally bash everyone and everything!): Kacie B.  (What can I say, I'm a sucker for a southern accent!)

Here's to another delicious season! I'll be toasting next week's episode with a bottle of wine from Ben's Evolve Winery.

xoxo,

Lisa

 

 

Santa Claus Fraud by Liz

Last month, something terrible happened. It was a day I had dreaded, but thought I had months, possibly years before I had to deal with it.  A day where childhood dreams would be shattered and the shit would hit the fan. My seven year-old figured out that Santa Claus is a fraud.

On her own.  Believe me, I practically used CIA interrogation techniques to try to figure out who had ruined it for her.  I was nine when my older brothers dropped the bomb.  I'll never forget where I was(the backseat of my parent's hugeass yellow Buick, rolling around with no seatbelts) or the disbelief I felt when they told me.  But even after seven rounds of questioning, Riley still insisted that she just suddenly realized that the whole Santa Claus thing didn't make sense. And I was all at once totally bummed and secretly proud of my little PI Spice.

So imagine me, caught like a deer in headlights at her declaration.  Thinking I had plenty of time to think about this day, I had NO IDEA how to react.  Do I deny? Run into the garage and pull out Twas The Night Before Christmas to build my case? Bring out that pesky Elf on the Shelf? Go to that freakin' web site that stalks Santa all year?

Yes, those all would have been grand ideas had I thought of them at the time. Instead, I just dumbly nodded my head and said, how did you figure it out?

The thing is, I just didn't want to lie to her about it.  Now, listen, I'm not judging people that stretch the truth about Santa Claus to keep things going for a few years longer. In fact, part of me wishes I had done that too.  It's just that I'm always on their little asses about telling the truth and, well, it felt hypocritical to fib about Ole St. Nick.

But then, I totally panicked. My five year-old son and ALL of Riley's first grade friends were still living in holiday dreamland. (Oh, because in case you were wondering, the Easter Bunny and The Tooth Fairy true identities were unveiled as well) And the last thing I needed was Riley spilling the beans at school and having every mom this side of the 405 freeway ready to beat my ass.  So after much threatening discussion, it was decided that this would stay our little secret.  And to my surprise, she's been very discreet. *breathes a huge sigh of relief*

Truth be told, I'm a bit bummed that the magic wore off so early.  Christmas just doesn't seem the same this year. Even as the least nostalgic person around, I wish I could have had just one more year to see that Santa sparkle in her eye. But it's also been a good teaching opportunity on how she can play Santa for other people-we grabbed a letter to Santa from Operation Santa Claus this year, and not only did she help pick and wrap all their gifts, she also pledged her own money to help bring the magic of Santa to a family that's had a tough year.  And helping others, in my humble opinion, is truly the reason for the season. Okay, I'll stop now. *steps off soapbox*

And there are some other benefits to Riley knowing that Santa's a fraud...

1. She's much better at hiding that freakin' Elf on the Shelf. I basically just moved him back and forth between three places.  Now he changes rooms, brings candy and visits Santa each night rather than a few times a month like he's done in years past. Although I did catch him in a compromising situation with Barbie and Ken last week that I'm going to assume was unintentional.

2. I'll finally get a good Santa picture.  With the pressure totally off, I'm sure I'll get that dazzling smile I've been desperate for the past SEVEN years.

3. When she calls me Mrs. Claus, I don't think it's because I just ate too many holiday cookies and drank too much eggnog.

4. She's better behaved.  Girlfriend knows that Santa was much more forgiving than me when it comes to the naughty list.

5. She finally understands why has Santa ignored her plea for a pony each year and wisely left it off her list this time.

Happy Holidays!  Hope you have a FABULOUS time celebrating with your loved ones!

xoxo, Liz

 

 

 

Best books of 2011 by Lisa

Like Liz mentioned in her best books of 2011 post, we read a f*ckload of books this year. And deciding which books made our favorites list was almost harder than deciding which movie Ryan Gosling looked hottest in this year. (For the record, after careful consideration, I've decided on Crazy, Stupid Love.) And even though it has NOTHING to do with this post...

 

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming...

One more little thing before I get to my list o' books...what kind of end-of year post would this be without another AWESOME giveaway? (Liz gave away ten yesterday so of course I will too!)  Just leave a comment and you'll be entered to win a BUNDLE O' BOOKS that includes novels from Meg Mitchell Moore to Kristin Hannah to Jackie Collins to Meg Cabot!  Check out the picture below to see all TEN books the winner will receive. We'll choose the winners on Monday December 26th after 6pm PST.

So without further adieu, here's my list.  And don't forget to tell me what YOUR fave novels of 2011 were!

LISA'S TOP BOOKS OF 2011

1. The Arrivals by Meg Mitchell Moore You know that feeling you get when a book sucks you in so hard and so fast that you think about the story and the characters when you're not even reading it? That's what happened to me when I devoured Meg Mitchell Moore's debut novel. I found her book about what happens when all of the children come back home to their parent's house at the same time so engaging and powerful that it resonated with me long after I finished reading it. So much so, that I knew it would make this list long before I ever officially created it. The Arrivals makes the perfect gift for any book lover who likes to dive in and barely come up for air until she's reached the last page. (PS: It also has one of my favorite covers of the year.)

 

2.  A Year and Six Seconds: A Love Story by Isabel Gillies  When I wrote about Isabel Gillies just last month, I was crushing hard. Swooning. In love. All of the above. And let's just say, the crush has only deepened since. (I've re-read the book since writing that post and have to say it was even better the second time.) It's a beautifully written true story about the deep pain and loss of heartbreak and divorce and the deep resilience and sense of humor of love. Ladies, if you haven't yet read this memoir, treat yourself to a copy this Christmas.
3. The Violets of March by Sarah Jio  We named Sarah Jio our Lit IT Girl for a reason. I was so engrossed in this novel about riding a high for ten years and then having to start over that I could not put this debut novel down. And when I say couldn't put it down, that's not an exaggeration. I carried it with me everywhere and, at one point, was reading it while feeding my daughter. This novel makes a perfect gift for anyone who loves a good mystery and a good love story all rolled into one. (And BTW, Sarah Jio isn't done wowing us for 2011, she has a second fabulous novel, The Bungalow, coming out on December 27th. Yes, two in one year! Be looking for her 5 Loves and a Dud and, of course, a chance to win one of 5 copies of The Bungalow later this week!)
4. It's Hard Not to Hate You by Valerie Frankel   In a nutshell, I had a baby at the beginning of this year so I needed a damn good laugh (or a thousand million!).  And with this memoir, the hilarious Valerie Frankel may have just given me the best baby gift of all (sorry, Mom!) In a nutshell, after a health crisis and unlocking years of pent up rage, Frankel discovers that your Bitchy Twin might just be your funniest, most valuable and honest ally. One of the funniest books I read all year (and that's sayin' a lot because there a lot that had me laughing), there was no question this book was going to make my list. Put it in the stocking of anyone who needs a good, healthy LOL.
5. If You Were Here by Jen Lancaster  When one of my favorite authors of all time made her fiction debut, I felt like one of those crazy people that lines up for the latest Apple gadget or to try out for American Idol. I might as well have stayed up all night and slept in the rain on the sidewalk as I waited for this book to come out. And once I got my little mitts on it, I was over 'da moon (me and her million other fans!). It's a story that asks- can your marriage survive a DIY renovation? It follows Amish-zombie-teen- romance author Mia and her husband Mac (and their pets) as they go through the  funny-process of buying and renovating their first home in the Chicago suburbs that John Hughes’s movies made famous...and a lot more! The John Hughes references alone make this novel a must-read!
And one biography pic!
Y'all may not have known that, in addition to being a memoir whore, I'm also a biography whore!
Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson. In a word, fascinating.
xoxo,
Lisa

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Best Books of 2011 by Liz

We love this time of year!  Warm hats, scarves, sassy boots and a reason to curl up by the fire with a good book and drink hot chocolate.  And it's been a great year here at CLIND-we've had so many fantastic authors on and have enjoyed every single one. (Thank you authors!) We also launched our own e-book, The D Word and relaunched I'll Have Who She's Having this past June-Thanks for all your support-we truly appreciate each and every one of you. We also read a shitload of books in 2011.  And there were so many wonderful ones that making a short list was was VERY difficult.  In fact, Lisa and I had such a hard time deciding that we each decided to come up with our own list.  Look for her's later this week!

And what kind of end-of year post would this be without an AWESOME giveaway?  Leave a comment and you'll be entered to win a BUNDLE O' BOOKS that includes novels from Cecelia Ahern, Josie Brown, Jenny Nelson and Joanne Rendell, among others!  Check out the picture below to see all TEN books the winner will receive. We'll choose the winners on Monday December 26th after 6pm PST.

So without further adieu, here's my list.  And don't forget to tell me what YOUR fave novels of 2011 were!

LIZ'S TOP BOOKS OF 2011

1. Girls in White Dresses by Jennifer Close I read this debut while on vacay in Hawaii over the summer and let's just say that I'm pretty thankful neither of my kids drowned while I was engrossed of this witty, refreshing tale of a group of friends after they graduate from college and struggle with heartbreak and career changes, all while attending endless bridal showers. A MUST read if you were a big SATC fan-the narrative really captures the spirit of Carrie & co.  It's not too late to pick this up for your stocking!

 

2. The Art of Forgetting by Camille Noe Pagan Another great debut!  When Marissa's BFF Julia gets hit by a cab and suffers brain damage, it changes the dynamic of their friendship forever. As Julia struggles to regain her memory, things come up that Marissa would much rather forget and things get a bit complicated.  A engaging story about friendship and forgiveness that I couldn't put down.  I highly recommend you grab a copy for you and your bestie TODAY.  One of my favorite covers of the year too!

 

3.  Skipping A Beat by Sarah Pekkanen I. Loved. This. Book! As a self-delared emotional robot, I found myself bawling like a freakin' baby during the last few chapters of this delightful novel.  When Julia's husband Michael has a near-death experience, he rewrites the rules of their struggling marriage, forcing her to choose whether to stay and take a leap of faith or leave forever. Insightful but also with with a healthy dose of Pekkanen's trademark humor, you won't be able to put it down- I PROMISE!

 

4. The First Husband by Laura Dave When Annie's long-time boyfriend suddenly leaves her, she rebounds with a vengeance, marrying a down-to-earth chef after three short months of dating. Soon Annie finds herself in a small Massachusetts town and wondering if she was too quick on the trigger.  When her ex returns and wants her back, things get really complicated...  Laura Dave is one of my fave writers, her narrative on love and life always hits home and The First Husband is no exception.  I devoured this book in four hours flat-a new record for me. The perfect gift to give yourself this season!

 

5. Best Kept Secret by Amy Hatvany Cadence thought she had it all-good job, successful husband and adorable son-until her marriage went off the rails and the stress of single motherhood drove her to start drinking heavily. It's only when her five-year old son is taken away that she realizes that her best kept secret has been discovered. Will she ever be able to find her way back and earn back the trust she's lost? Honest and thought-provoking, I promise you'll be thinking of Cadence long after you finish this fantastic book.

And one YA bonus pick!

Y'all know I have love for those young adult novels...here's my fave of 2011.

Bumped by Megan McCafferty- When a virus makes everyone over the age of eighteen infertile, things get a little bit CRAZY.  Would-be parents pay top dollar for teens to conceive and carry babies, making them the most prized citizens in society-and the most genetically blessed are in the highest demand and considered celebrities. I LOVED this book-very high concept about the business of having babies, and our increasing desire for genetic perfection. I'm anxiously awaiting a sequel!

 

 

Thanks for such a great year and here's to a wonderful 2012!  Don't forget to leave a comment to be entered to win a BUNDLE O' BOOKS!  xoxo, Liz

Talli Roland's 5 Loves and a Dud

When we're in the mood for some good ol' Chick Lit, we love nothing more than to dive into a Talli Roland novel. And her latest e-book, Build a Man is nothing short of sassy, fun and funny. Just like she is! (Her 5 Loves and a Dud are also humorous and honest- our favorite combo!) Here's the skinny on Build a Man: Slave to the rich, rude and deluded, cosmetic surgery receptionist Serenity Holland longs for the day she's a high-flying tabloid reporter. Unfortunately, every pitch she sends out disappears like her clients' liposuctioned fat, never to be seen again. Then she meets Jeremy Ritchie -- the hang-dog man determined to be Britain's Most Eligible Bachelor by making himself over from head to toe and everything in between -- giving Serenity a story no editor could resist.

With London's biggest tabloid on board and her very own column tracking Jeremy's progress from dud to dude, Serenity is determined to be a success, even going undercover to gain intimate access to Jeremy's life. But when Jeremy's surgery goes drastically wrong and Serenity is ordered to cover all the car-crash goriness, she must decide how far she really will go for her dream job

Not only is Build a Man fun, but it's also full of deeper emotion. You'll truly enjoy it! Want an e-copy? Just leave a comment and be entered to win one of five e-copies. We'll randomly select the winners after 6pm PST on Sunday, December 11.

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS...TALLI ROLAND'S 5 LOVES AND A DUD

1.  Oh wine, how I love you. There’s something about its velvety smoothness at the end of a long writing day that just soothes the soul. I’m not a wine connoisseur by any stretch of the imagination – in fact, I’ve been known to tell waiters ‘whatever is cheapest’ – but if I had to choose, I’d go with Merlot. Or, if it’s a rare hot summer’s day in London, a nice cool rosé. Cheers!

2.  Continuing on the liquid theme, I can’t imagine my life without coffee. Every morning, I toddle bleary-eyed to my espresso machine. Although my coffee is so strong the spoon practically stands up in it, I love the thick black tar-like slurry. The stronger, the better. I need to get geared up for the day ahead! The best coffee I’ve ever had is from a small shop in Borough Market called Monmouth Coffee. If that doesn’t get you going, nothing well.

3.  One of my favourite places in the world is London’s South Bank. It’s right on the River Thames and it’s the cultural centre of London, but it has a much more sentimental importance to me: it’s where I first met my husband on a blind date; where we got engaged; and where we got married. With fabulous views over Waterloo Bridge and on to Saint Paul’s, it sums up everything wonderful about my life in London.

4.  This might sound like a strange thing to love, but my favourite time of the day is snuggling into bed with a fabulous novel before going to sleep. I love pulling my comfy duvet around me and losing myself in a book, bathed in the soft glow of the bedside lamp. It’s a moment of perfect contentedness.

5.  Sticky toffee pudding has got to be on my list for sure! A moist, sponge-like base with melted toffee topping = YUM. Add a scoop of double cream or vanilla ice-cream, and I’m in food heaven. If you haven’t tried this, you really must get yourself some straight away. Once you have a taste, there’s no turning back.

DUD

There’s nothing I hate more than taking London’s subway (the Tube) on a warm summer’s day during rush hour. Why? Well, picture a closet-like space rammed with men in polyester business suits . . . men who have yet to discover the joys of deodorant. Now imagine your face just inches from one of those men’s armpits, with no room to move away. Turn the dial to thirty degrees Celsius and you have a hellish scenario even Dante couldn’t dream up!

To find out more about the talented Talli Roland, visit her website and follow her on Twitter and Facebook.

And be sure to download a copy of Build a Man currently available for only .99!

Thanks, Talli!

xoxo, L&L

Marilyn Brant's 5 Loves and a Dud

Ahhh...Europe.  How AWESOME would it be to spend a summer there?  Eating french bread and brie in France and red wine and pasta in Italy.  And calories don't count there, right?  Is that why European women can eat carbs and not gain weight?! Damn them! Today we've got the lovely Marilyn Brant sharing her 5 Loves and a Dud.  Her latest novel, A Summer in Europe makes us want to hop on the next plane there.  (Seriously, let's go!)  It's delightful and fun, we think you'll enjoy.

Here's the scoop on A Summer in Europe: On her thirtieth birthday, Gwendolyn Reese receives an unexpected present from her widowed Aunt Bea: a grand tour of Europe in the company of Bea's Sudoku and Mahjongg Club. The prospect isn't entirely appealing. But when the gift she is expecting--an engagement ring from her boyfriend--doesn't materialize, Gwen decides to go.

At first, Gwen approaches the trip as if it's the math homework she assigns her students, diligently checking monuments off her must-see list. But amid the bougainvillea and stunning vistas of southern Italy, something changes. Gwen begins to live in the moment--skipping down stone staircases in Capri, running her fingers over a glacier in view of the Matterhorn, racing through the Louvre, and taste-testing pastries at a Marseilles cafe. Reveling in every new experience--especially her attraction to a charismatic British physics professor--Gwen discovers that the ancient wonders around her are nothing compared to the renaissance unfolding within. . .

Sound good?  Then leave a comment and you'll be entered to win one of FIVE copies!  We'll choose the winners on Sunday December 4th after 6pm PST.  Good luck!

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS...MARILYN BRANT'S 5 LOVES AND A DUD

5 LOVES

1. Great Movies I love classic movies like "The Philadelphia Story" and "Roman Holiday" and more recent films that are, in my opinion, just as classic, like "When Harry Met Sally," "Shakespeare in Love," "While You Were Sleeping," "A Room with a View" and just about every cinematic production of "Pride and Prejudice." I love the way I can lose myself in films like these...find myself in the drawing room with Darcy and Elizabeth or hanging out at the deli with Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan or listening in (alongside Jimmy Stewart) while Katharine Hepburn and Cary Grant banter by the poolside. I also love movies like "Footloose," "Dirty Dancing" and "La Bamba" that make me want to sing and dance along. And I especially love watching really well-made films of any era -- everything from "It Happened One Night" to "The Princess Bride" to "The King's Speech" -- with family and friends, so we can experience it together and talk about it for hours afterward. Often over dessert.

2. Food  Yeah, real specific, huh? Just so you know, I TRIED to narrow it down to a single edible item like, say, Thai spring rolls, which I really love (especially with plum dipping sauce), or even just one particular cuisine, like Italian, which I also love -- and not only because I grew up with Sicilian friends and married a man whose family comes from the Tuscany/Liguria regions. No. The sticking point was that it just didn't seem fair to talk about my adoration of crisp garden salads with freshly chopped tomatoes, cucumbers and romaine...without also mentioning desserts that I can't imagine my life without, like gelato, baklava, English trifle or brownies. How do I say, "Oh, I love dips like roasted-red-pepper hummus," and callously ignore my deep affection for thin-crust sausage-and-mushroom pizza or garlic mashed potatoes or grilled jumbo shrimp? You see how that's a problem, right? So, really, with very few exceptions (see my Dud below), I love ALL food, and I embrace this.

3. Traveling  I've had a pretty insatiable case of wanderlust since I was a kid and have spent much of my life plotting out where my next trip was going to be and how long I'd have to save my allowance (or my paycheck) to get there. When I was in high school, I was an AFS exchange student in Brisbane, Australia for three months, and it really changed the direction of my career. Up until then, I had my future planned out until I was about 80. After the trip, I didn't know what, exactly, I was going to do with my life...LOL. It made the end of high school and the first couple years of college more confusing, but I think it was important for me to go into those years with an open mind. In college, purely on impulse, I auditioned for a folk dance group and ended up performing with them for 2 years, including going with them on a summer-long European dance tour when I was 19. That, too, was a life changer because I really fell in love with Europe and knew I had to go back. Which I did, a few years later, with this world-history teacher I was crazy about...and he proposed to me there, on London Bridge. That was almost 20 years ago ;). Together, the two of us backpacked abroad quite often before we became parents. Since then, our trips have all been much closer to home and much shorter (!!), but I still really love going on roadtrips, taking long walks through other cities and getting a new perspective simply by being in a different place.

4. Music and Musicals  The first film my parents let me stay up late to watch was "The Sound of Music" when I was in 3rd grade. I was absolutely mesmerized by it. At age 8, I wanted to BE Julie Andrews -- well, once she stopped acting like a nun. (I'm Catholic, so I knew enough about nuns not to overly romanticize...) But that musical fueled my desire to learn how to read music and to play my first instrument. It also hooked me on stage musicals. Going to see live productions of "The Music Man" and "My Fair Lady" and, later, "The Phantom of the Opera" and "Les Miserables" -- plus listening to several hours of pop songs every day, which drove my parents nuts! -- was a huge part of my music education. These days, I can't write a character without knowing what kind of songs they'd listen to and, for my own amusement and for any readers who are music lovers, I always have a soundtrack for each of my books.

5. Math I know, I know. You're wondering if, maybe, Liz & Lisa accidentally switched this Love with my Dud since I know a lot of writers who'd probably prefer facing a cold virus over an algebra equation. But I genuinely love math. (Note: I did not say I always understand it!) One of the big reasons is because math correlates strongly with music (see Love #4) and, when I was a junior in high school, I had an amazingly cool algebra teacher/amateur guitarist who shared my love of both. My senior year, after having just been to a physics class where we'd had a lecture on acoustics, I saw my old algebra teacher in the hall, and he and I got to talking about the number of oscillations per second of major musical notes, like the A above Middle C (which is 440 Hz, in case you were dying to know and, yes, in answer to your silent question, I AM a geek). This led me on a fascinating side project of figuring out -- by using an equation I totally can't remember now -- what the vibrations would be for every note on the piano. Seriously, I calculated all 88 of them one night, charted them out and gave a copy of it to my old teacher. It wasn't for extra credit or anything. I wasn't even in his class anymore! It was Just For Fun. (See? Card-carrying levels of geekdom.) But that's when I knew that absolutely any subject on earth could be thrilling for kids if it could be made relevant to their lives and could tap into a passion. A priceless insight for someone who later became a teacher herself...and the parent of a kid whose favorite subject is -- you guessed it -- math.

 

DUD:

Cold viruses As I write this, I'm up to my elbows in crumpled Kleenex tissues which, no doubt about it, influences my choice for this particular Dud. I have had this very bad cold for six days already, and it was one of those types that hit me with the force of an express train -- immediate, unrelenting and painful. I. Hate. It. For what it's worth, I also don't like celery or sardines. I find mean-spirited gossips highly annoying. And I'm not a big fan of driving around in busy parking lots, particularly during the holiday season. But I will deal with all of these (okay, not the gossips) almost cheerfully if I don't get another cold like this one EVER again. Hope all of you are staying healthy ("Wash your hands! Get lots of Vitamin C! Go to sleep at a reasonable hour!" Do I sound like my mother yet? *grin*) and here's wishing everyone reading this a wonderful end of the year.

Thanks, Lisa and Liz!!

Thank YOU Marilyn! xo, L&L

To read more about Marilyn, head on over to her website or find her on Facebook and Twitter.

The First Word Is Always The Scariest

This past weekend, I got a ton of shit done.  I channeled my inner OCD'er and finally put away the mass amount of birthday presents from both kids' birthdays the week prior. (Bounce house party overload, anyone?) I cleaned out my inbox.  I cleaned out my outbox.  I ordered my Christmas cards. I put my books in alphabetical order by genre.  All to avoid the one thing that I HAD to do. Write the next chapter of our third book.

You'd think I'd be dying to dig in.  I'm loving the concept and what we've written so far.  In fact, dare I say that I think this is by far the best work we've ever done?! We've finally learned to say more with less and for once we aren't making writing decisions based what we think others want to read-we're writing what WE WANT to read.  And it's surprised us both what a huge difference that small change is making.

So then why the hell did I have to practically reorganize my entire house before I could sit down and write?

Fear.

As many of you know, there's so much fear that goes into writing.  Fear that you won't be able to create the magic you did last week.  Fear that your writing partner is going to tear the shit out of it.  Fear that you're pouring your heart and soul into something that may not ever see the light of day.

So for me, it's all about writing that first word.  If I can get past that, then I know I'll find my sweet spot again.  That's why it's the scariest.  On the way to our writing retreat a few weeks ago, I sat on the plane, fingers poised, doubting myself, thinking my time might be better served getting drunk with the cute guy sitting next to me. The fear I felt about that first word was so overwhelming that I felt physically sick, and it wasn't from the all the Barcardi and coke drinking going on around me. (Btw, Barcardi? Really? The year 2000 called, they want their drink back...)

But on the first day of our retreat, I finally did it. I wrote the first word of the first chapter of what will hopefully be our breakout book.  And you know what?  Once I got over that hump, the words flowed from my fingers for two days straight.

So when I found myself in the same position a few weeks later, I knew the drill.  Just put on those earphones with my new favorite song, drown out MarioKart and SpongeBob and start writing.  Simple, right?

Maybe.  All I know is my house is always the most organized when I'm writing a book.  But maybe next time I'm faced with fear, I can pop over, read this post, and remember it's all gravy after that first word.

In honor of NaNoWriMo, we want you tell us what the hardest part of the writing process is for you.  Leave a comment and you'll be entered to win a copy Skipping A Beat by one of our favorite authors, Sarah Pekkanen.  We'll choose the winners on Sunday, November 20th after 6pm PST.

xoxo,

Liz

Anna David's 5 Loves and a Dud

AWESOME MEMOIR ALERT!  So, you already know that we're closet memoir whores.  Something about the way people let us into their lives and write about it so beautifully(or in the case, so funny!) makes us want to read more. Today we're featuring a fabulous author and her fantastic memoir, Falling for MeAnna David is the author of the novels Party Girl and Bought.  She's also written for the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, Redbook, Details and many other publications.  She's also appeared on national television programs including Today, and CNN's Showbiz Tonight. In short, she's a freakin' STUD!  And we really loved her 5 Loves-especially #4!

Here's the scoop on Falling for me: Like most women, whether they’ve chosen the Fortune 500 career path or have had five kids by 35, Anna David wondered if she’d made the right choices. Then she came upon the book Sex and the Single Girl by Helen Gurley Brown, Cosmopolitan’s fearless leader from the mid-sixties to the late nineties. Immediately connecting with Gurley Brown’s unique message of self-empowerment combined with femininity, Anna vowed to use Sex as a lesson plan, venturing out of her comfort zone in the hope of overcoming the fears and insecurities that had haunted her for years. Embarking on a journey both intensely personal and undeniably universal, she becomes adventurous and spontaneous—reviving her wardrobe and apartment, taking French lessons, dashing off to Seville, and whiling nights away with men she never would have considered before. In the process, she ends up meeting the person really worth changing for: herself.

Sound great?  It is! Leave a comment and you'll be entered to win one of FIVE copies.  We'll choose the winners on Sunday November 20th after 6pm PST.

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS...ANNA DAVID'S 5 LOVES AND A DUD

1.  Going to the Farmer’s Market on Sundays. I prefer going to a smaller one in Larchmont rather than the massive Hollywood one because part of what I love about this ritual is that it feels sort of homey and quaint and hundreds of stalls isn’t my idea of homey and quaint. I usually labor over whether or not to get strawberries since they tend to get soft quickly before snagging heirloom tomatoes and avocados (to later chop up the tomato, mix with onion, and scoop into the avocados). Sometimes I stop at this roasted chicken stall (their garlic topping, which lasts for months, is ridiculous) or get these cheesy crackers that I crumble and use in place of croutons in salads. My last stop is always the flower stall, where I get lilies because I’m addicted to the way they smell. At home, I put them in water mixed with a dash of lemon, bleach and sugar, which helps them to last all week—as in just long enough for me to go get some more the following Sunday.

2. Hiking up Runyon Canyon. Some of my friends hate it because they think it’s too crowded or too Hollywood (it’s impossible to go without seeing someone famous—usually Kathy Griffin in full makeup) but I love it. Right at one of the entrances, there’s a booth set up that contains bottled water and granola bars that works on the honor system. In a big city like Los Angeles! Whoever set it up trusts people to leave a dollar if they take something. I never actually have because I usually walk around the world with a bottle of water all but surgically attached to me but it always makes me feel like I live in a small town or something when I see it.

3. The Bar Method, which is basically, from what I can determine through my very unscientific survey, the hardest workout known to man: you essentially line up at a ballet barre and work your muscles like you never knew they could work. Any class where the teacher trills about how great it is to see legs and arms shaking because that means you’re really working isn’t for the faint of heart or body. The experience is actually somewhat miserable and I think one of the reasons I may love it so much is the sheer relief I feel when it’s over: it’s like the glory of removing the pebble from your shoe that was making your foot hurt but times about a million. Plus, the Bar Method I go to is on Third Street in West Hollywood, one block away from Joan’s On Third—the perfect place to reward yourself for your nearly impossible workout with some of their fried cinnamon sugar sprinkled pita crisps.

4. Discovering new writers I love, or new books by writers I’ve long loved. Right now, it’s all about Jennifer Egan and A Visit From The Goon Squad but before that it was this woman Sacha Scoblic who wrote a memoir about sobriety called Unwasted. The sign of a great book, to me, is that I get excited when I’m brushing my teeth at night because I always read before I fall asleep. The problem is that I’m a pretty all-or-nothing person so if I don’t feel that way, I usually don’t end up finishing the book. I also love taking an entire week to read the Sunday New York Times. I’m someone who has to force herself a little to care about current events; it’s a horrible quality I’m deeply ashamed of but somehow the Sunday New York Times manages to make everything interesting and also allow me numerous opportunities to slip, “As I was reading the other day in the Times” into conversations whenever I can and imagine it makes me sound incredibly sophisticated. While I savor the Book Review and Sunday Styles, I’m often also surprised by the gems I discover in the magazine or the business section—or even, who knows—on the front page!

5. The near seasonlessness of Los Angeles weather. I never knew what a weather person I was until I moved to New York a few years ago on a whim and stayed for over three years. I came back to LA last February and the day I landed, it was 80 degrees. I had just endured, essentially, three months of blizzards. And now that it’s fall, in New York I would be starting to panic, thinking I’d better get out there immediately and enjoy the pretty weather because before I knew it, it was all going to be snatched from me and I’d be forced back into my two coat-mitten-hat-scarf uniform. But in LA, the end of summer doesn’t feel like a great tragedy because it essentially feels like summer all year long.

DUD

I hate to say it but e-readers. I have a Kindle—my second one—and though I’d love to love it, I simply can’t let go of my desire to hold a physical book. I like to know what page I’m on, not the percentage of the book that I’ve read, and if I’m slightly bored, I like to skip ahead, read a couple of paragraphs or pages and see if I’m more intrigued by what’s coming next—usually I am. I abandon a lot of books that I know I’d finish and probably like if I had the actual physical books. I was listening to Mark Maron’s podcast (another love!) and he was reading pages of Keith Richards’ Life and I thought it sounded amazing. But on the Kindle, I’d stopped reading almost immediately.

Thanks so much Anna!  xo, L&L

To read more about Anna, head on over to her website or find her on Twitter and Facebook.